Well I'm confused . In the movies, before I moved to America , in "Harry Met Sally" and "Sleepless in Seattle " , people have time to fall in love . People invest in talking and walking , they go through the highs and lows , then they move in and fall in love. I seem to be experiencing a whole cult of Bachelors , whose disclaimer is , " I don't believe in marriage" ," I don't know if I ever want to live with anyone" , "hey I'm busy for a couple of weeks but maybe we can fit it in in the second quarter" .
The modern American career driven male, definately puts love on the back burner, it's something to fit in between the endless hours of work .
In L.A. it seems I have discovered , men operate a very calculated roster system, its probably three tiered: Women you just want to go to bed with , women you'd consider dating , and those special ones that make you feel good enough about yourself that you may actually let accompany to a business supper .Go out on a date with any man in L.A. and find that his cell phone is ringing off the hook with all the other options at the same time.
Come on men of this giant continent ! Get yourselves together and stop being so precious, fall in love ! Good old fashioned eternal love, open the doors of your heart , and leave the market place out of your bed . Love that you can loose your self in for years , that fills your soul , that lights the way. You just can't be that calculated , it makes me want to run away to Tuscany and fall in love with a truffle farmer.
Once I had an experience with a musician that really sucked , here in L.A., he chased me around for months but everytime we talked about love he had a mountain of stipulations. He didn't believe in marriage , "modern woman can support herself" ,(as if this is the only reason we marry), and he didn't want to live with anyone .But he would expect that if I was with him , I knew how to cook and clean and exactly how to please him in bed.
He's off MY roster .
I just can't fly with all this because I believe love is boundless and I just don't want to be with someone who doesn't believe in it . What happened to the great American love story ? We just all got so uptight, we just got so formula about it .
One of my biggest love stories to date was with a man who lived on the East Coast for seven years , for seven years I lived and worked on the west . He couldn't move west because of his big career and I couldn't move East because of mine . But what can really be more important than love ? It seems like we all want to get everything we need with minimum commitment, but hey, life is a committment . Who are we kidding?
I want the Harry met Sally story or at least the Annie Hall . I don't want to hear more reasons why men can't surrender to the experience of love, I've heard them all:
" I'm too busy , I'm focusing on my career",
" I don't want to marry before I'm 36" ,
" I don't really want a relationship right now , but do you want to go for supper on Friday night ?"
" I only date under 21 year olds" .
" I'm not exclusive right now, I have two other dates tonight" .
" I'm not going to fall in love till I've made my first million" .
" I am freezing my sperm".
I want eternal, big spirited love . Bring back the good old fashioned American love story , not for publicity , not for social status or economic gain, not as a crutch to make your first 5million, but just for the spirit of it.